The Hidden Almanac for
Monday January 27th, 2014
Episode 59
Previous episode: 2014-01-24
Next episode: 2014-01-29


Today is the birthday of Ethel Khan, barbarian chieftain. It is also the day a clutch of seal pups was rescued, and the day Eland the Younger described some wasps. It is the Day of Dreams, and in the garden, there are night blooms.

Be Safe, and Stay Out of Trouble.


Welcome to the Hidden Almanac, I’m Reverend Mord.

Today is January 27th, 2014.

Today is the birthday of Ethel Khan, a barbarian chieftain noted for her savagery, hatred of monasteries, and exquisite table manners. She is estimated to have martyred well over a thousand people in religious orders. Historians speculate that time spent in a finishing school run by nuns may have contributed to this irrational hatred. On at least one occasion, she delayed attacking an under-defended city in order to burn a convent, allowing the city time to fortify its defenses.

She was eventually killed by one of her lieutenants, who said “Look, we all enjoy setting fire to abbeys and all, but Ethel was really taking it too far. We’re barbarians, not weirdos.” Her grave is rumored to contain fabulous riches, but has never been located.

It was on this day that the whale wisewoman “Six Notes Returning From The Western Stars” rescued nine seal pups from a small school of sharks. The seals were safely returned to their mothers and the sharks were given very stern looks until they went away.

And it was on this day that Eland the Younger documented tool use in potter wasps. Not content to simply build small baked-mud homes, some of the wasps had taken to shaping the mud with small sticks and pebbles, smoothing out rough edges and making pleasing designs. Naturalists have continued to document this behavior and note that the wasps appear to like stripes and chevrons, but shun polka dots.

Today is the Day of Dreams. It would be a good idea not to fall asleep today, for obvious reasons. Sirens will be activated at random intervals around the city to keep residents from falling into dangerous slumber.

In the garden today, since you won’t be sleeping anyway, consider the shape of your garden by moonlight. Night-blooming flowers are available in many seed catalogs, including moonflower, jasmine, nicotiana, and several night-blooming squashes. Many of these flowers are strongly perfumed, to gratify the senses on warm summer nights.

The Hidden Almanac is brought to you by Red Wombat Tea Company, purveyors of fine and inaccessible teas. Red Wombat --- “We Dig Tea.”

Also brought to you by Elwood’s Pickle Breeders! The first pickle pups of the new year are just about ready for sale. These are playful, crisp, firm-fleshed pickles. Stop by and meet one today!

That’s the Hidden Almanac for January 27th, 2014. Be safe, and stay out of trouble.


Out of Character

The Hidden Almanac is a production of Dark Canvas Media, written by Ursula Vernon and performed and produced by Kevin Sonney. Our theme music is Moon Valley and our exit music is Red in Black, both by Kosta T. You can hear more from Kosta T at the Free Music Archive. All other content is copyright 2013, Ursula Vernon.

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