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The Hidden Almanac for
Monday February 3rd, 2014
Episode 62
The Hidden Almanac
Previous episode: 2014-01-31
Next episode: 2014-02-05

Summary[]

Today in Echo Harbor, there were whales. Today is also the day Lord Hogshead made an important discovery. It is the Feast Day of Bourbon, and in the garden, snow continues.

Be Safe, and Stay Out of Trouble.

Transcription[]

Welcome to the Hidden Almanac, I’m Reverend Mord.

Today is February 3rd, 2014.

It was on this day in the Year of the Moaning Stair that the ghosts of a thousand skeletal whales drifted through the skies of Echo Harbor. Onlookers described more than a dozen species, from orcas to blue whales. The whale ghosts floated a few dozen feet off the ground and passed through the upper stories of several buildings. Several prominent citizens described this experience as “Unsettling and rather sad, but what are you going to do?”

The whales vanished by the next morning.

It is the birthday of Lord Reginald Hogshead, credited with the invention of the grilled cheese sandwich. His cheesy magnum opus took seven years to perfect, until one night, in his buried laboratory, it occurred to him to butter the bread before applying cheese. Unfortunately for Lord Hogshead, his victory was short lived, as he suffered a fatal heart attack brought on by the excitement. His wife was able to recreate the invention from his notes and went on to great fortune.

And it was on this day that the camel danced with the fanged things until midnight.

Today is the Feast Day of Bourbon. Celebration is strictly regulated during business hours. Most hagiographers believe this to be a made up holiday created from a diabolical partnership between greeting card companies and liquor distilleries.

In the garden this week, no news, as the interns are still digging out from under the snow.

The Hidden Almanac is brought to you by Red Wombat Tea Company, purveyors of fine and inaccessible teas. Red Wombat --- “We Dig Tea.”

Also brought to you by Whitefoot’s Mix Tape Repair. Bring us your old cassettes, and Whitefoot’s will repair them! Whitefoots: We have several pencils.[1]

That’s the Hidden Almanac for February 3rd, 2014. Be safe, and stay out of trouble.

Outro[]

Out of Character

The Hidden Almanac is a production of Dark Canvas Media, written by Ursula Vernon and performed and produced by Kevin Sonney. Our theme music is Moon Valley and our exit music is Red in Black, both by Kosta T. You can hear more from Kosta T at the Free Music Archive. All other content is copyright 2013, Ursula Vernon.

Notes[]

  1. Younger listeners may not recall the days when a good-sized pencil was an invaluable aid in dealing with tangled and otherwise broken cassette tapes: you could stick it through one of the sprocket holes and wind the tape forward or back, thus avoiding the necessity of acquiring expensive specialized equipment to perform the same function.
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