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The Hidden Almanac for
Monday March 10th, 2014
Episode 77
HAalbumart-podcast
Previous episode: 2014-03-07
Next episode: 2014-03-12

SummaryEdit

Today we remember the Winter Blight. It is also the birthday of a large frog, and the day the moon disappeared. It is the Feast Day of St. Maude, and in the garden, it may be Spring.

Be Safe, and Stay Out of Trouble.

TranscriptionEdit

Welcome to the Hidden Almanac, I’m Reverend Mord.

Today is March 10th, 2014.

It is the twenty-fifth anniversary of the Winter Blight that swept vineyards throughout the continent. Winter blight caused the grapevines to send out leaves far too early in the year, freezing on the vine and weakening the plant severely. Many great vineyards were lost. One enterprising vineyard owner set up heaters in the fields, keeping the leaves unfrozen. The expense in space heaters and extension cords was extraordinary, but the resulting “Blight Wines” were highly sought after and more than paid for the expense. The cause of the Winter Blight was never found, and has not struck again, although botanists suspect that it is only a matter of time.

And it is the birthday of a large frog, who was spawned in a small mud puddle two years ago. She spent a frantic youth as a tadpole in the shrinking mud puddle, but pulled through thanks to unusually powerful spring rains. She plans to treat today as just another day, and requests that no one make a fuss.

And it was on this day in 1841 that the moon vanished. It had been there the night before, but was suddenly gone. Tides ceased, much to the dismay of many small reef creatures, and the planet’s orbit was described as “having a bit of a wiggle.” Fortunately, the moon reappeared the following night and acted as if nothing had happened.

It is the Feast Day of Saint Maude, patron of women who vacuum in high heels. St. Maude was much worshipped during the fifties, but has largely fallen out of favor, except ironically. There is no information on whether ironic worship of saints still counts, and opinions among researchers vary.

In the garden, could it be spring at last? We advise being cautious in your hope. Hope is dangerous, particularly when tender plants are involved. Stick to planting lettuces. Few are terribly traumatized when the lettuces die.

The Hidden Almanac is brought to you by Red Wombat Tea Company, purveyors of fine and inaccessible teas. Red Wombat --- “We Dig Tea.”

Also brought to you by the Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Lettuces. Is no one screening these sponsors? Really? Very well. A wilted lettuce is a lettuce that can no longer reach its full potential. Be kind to lettuces.

That’s the Hidden Almanac for March 10th, 2014. Be safe, and stay out of trouble.

OutroEdit

Out of Character

The Hidden Almanac is a production of Dark Canvas Media, written by Ursula Vernon and performed and produced by Kevin Sonney. Our theme music is Moon Valley and our exit music is Red in Black, both by Kosta T. You can hear more from Kosta T at the Free Music Archive. All other content is copyright 2013, Ursula Vernon.

Notes Edit

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