The Hidden Almanac for
Monday March 24th, 2014
Episode 83
Previous episode: 2014-03-21
Next episode: 2014-03-26


Today we remember the next Hateful Decree. We also mark the identification of a new disease, and the publication of an important book. It is the Feast Day of Our Lady of the Olive Groves, and in the garden, we plant.

Be Safe, and Stay Out of Trouble.


Welcome to the Hidden Almanac, I’m Reverend Mord.

Today is March 24th, 2014.

It was on this day in 1782 that the next of the Hateful Decrees was passed, which outlawed gathering in groups of more than one. It was amended some days later on the grounds that the population of the city would suffer a severe decline nine months later. No arrests were made, as they would have required the arresting officer to break the law themselves. The rewritten decree outlawed gatherings in groups of greater than ten, which made workplaces problematic and holidays somewhat less so.

And it was on this day in 1988 that chronic wasting disease was identified in deer and elk herds in the highlands. Measures were taken to cull the infected animals, and icons of Saint Anna Cervinius were handed out along with hunting licenses. Rumors that some of the elk had been infected with a new and virulent strain that led them to attack other creatures, including humans and bears, were never confirmed. Scarred and traumatized bears, newly emerging from hibernation, were considered inconclusive evidence.

And it is the anniversary of the publication of “Essential Vegetables of the West,” the sequel to Major Torgblossom’s great work, “Essential Vegetables of the East.” Planned sequels did not materialize, as “Essential Vegetables of the Far North” was a thin pamphlet and researchers working in the Far South gathered over three tons of notecards and are still consolidating their research.

It is the Feast Day of Our Lady of the Olive Groves, a vision that appeared to a lonely olive farmer in the small hours of the night. She appeared on subsequent evenings to a growing crowd, warning the visitants of a coming plague, and then vanished.

In the garden, we are reaching the point where people buy plants to put outside, heedless of frost warnings, because they just can’t take it any more. Embrace this feeling, for in loss is the beginning of wisdom.

The Hidden Almanac is brought to you by Red Wombat Tea Company, purveyors of fine and inaccessible teas. Red Wombat --- “We Dig Tea.”

Also sponsored by Stink-B-Gone Stinkbug and General Stench Remover! Got a smell? Apply Stink-B-Gone! Use only in a well-ventilated area. May cause eyeball loss. Stink-B-Gone!

That’s the Hidden Almanac for March 24th, 2014. Be safe, and stay out of trouble.


Out of Character

The Hidden Almanac is a production of Dark Canvas Media, and is written by Ursula Vernon. Our exit music is Red in Black and our into music is Moon Valley, both by Kosta T. You can hear more music from Kosta T at the Free Music Archive. The Hidden Almanac is copyright 2013-2014, Ursula Vernon.

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