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The Hidden Almanac for
Wednesday June 18th, 2014
Episode 120
HAalbumart-podcast
Previous episode: 2014-06-16
Next episode: 2014-06-20

SummaryEdit

Today, Prince Sergei III was captured by Troyzantine! Oh no! It is the birthday of both the Writhing Prophet and the Seventh Prime Minister. It is the Feast Day of St. Andrei, and in the garden, there’s a cat!

Be safe, and have a wonderful day!

TranscriptionEdit

Welcome to the Hidden Almanac, I’m Pastor Drom, filling in for Reverend Mord while he’s away.

Today is June 18th, 2014. And I have a note here from Reverend Mord saying that I have to read the entire story and not cut out the unpleasant bits. Because he says we have a duty to history.

You know, he was like this in seminary, too.

At any rate. On this day in 1545, Prince Sergei III was captured by the Troyzantine forces following the defection of one of his closest advisors. (That wasn’t very nice of his advisor…) The prince was taken in chains to the river, still under blockade, and arrangements made to transport him to Troyzantium. (Now, I know some of you listeners are probably worried about the prince, but don’t be! This is history, so we already know he’s going to live. I mean, he’s been dead for over four hundred years, so he’s not going to live forever, but he’ll get through this patch okay.)

And it was on this day in the year 971 that the Writhing Prophet was born. He was an unpleasant fellow. He’s dead now too. We’re all kind of grateful for that, not that you wish people dead, but I think it’s okay to wish them to be historical.

It is the birthday of the seventh Prime Minister, who introduced a number of notable reforms and ushered in the historic peace with the mole-people. Unlike his short-lived predecessor, he remained in power for many years, before retiring and passing away peacefully, surrounded by his children and grandchildren. (See, that’s a good way to go. At least, if you like children. I suppose if you don’t like children, that would be sort of unpleasant. You’d be trying to die and all these little kids would be shrieking and demanding popsicles. Hmm.)

It is the Feast Day of Saint Andrei, the only known vampire saint. St. Andrei held off a barbarian assault single-handedly, saving the monastery of St. Crocuta, which organized blood drives to keep their defender fed during what became a two-week siege. St. Andrei is rumored to still live in the crypts under the monastery, and will rise to defend it, should barbarian hordes ever invade. As the monastery is currently surrounded by strip malls, this seems unlikely.

In the garden-ooh! There’s a cat! It doesn’t seem to have a collar. I hope it’s not lost. I’m going to put out food for it!

The Hidden Almanac is brought to you by Red Wombat Security Company, purveyors of fine home defense systems. Red Wombat --- “We Dig Moats.”

Also sponsored by Whipping Crow Records, announcing a city-wide tour of some band you haven’t heard of. Because you’re not cool enough. We wouldn’t actually sell you a ticket anyway.

Hmm, that seems like an odd sort of sponsor message…well, I’m sure they’re very nice people.

That’s the Hidden Almanac for June 18th, 2014. Be safe, and have a wonderful day!

OutroEdit

Out of Character

The Hidden Almanac is a production of Dark Canvas Media, and is written by Ursula Vernon. Our exit music is Red in Black and our into music is Moon Valley, both by Kosta T. You can hear more music from Kosta T at the Free Music Archive. The Hidden Almanac is copyright 2013-2014, Ursula Vernon.

Notes Edit

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