The Hidden Almanac for
Monday September 29th, 2014
Episode 164
Previous episode: 2014-09-26
Next episode: 2014-10-01


Today we discuss the origins of the word “wogitating.” It is the Feast Day of St. Mellonius, and in the garden, there are perennials.

Be Safe, and Stay Out of Funky Trouble.


Welcome to the Funkadelic Almanac, I’m Swinging Reverend Mord.

Today is September 29th, 2014.

Drom? Drom!

PD: What? I’m here!

RM: How much longer is this miracle going to take? Are you even working on it?

PD: I am totally working on it! I’m wogitating the thingy.

RM: …wogitating…the…thingy.

PD: It’s a technical term. You know. Thingies. You wogitate them. Look, I can’t explain this to a layperson.

RM: You’re just making up words, aren’t you?

PD: No, I’m wogitating. Keep your mask on. It’ll be done when it’s done.

RM: I can’t take much more of this, Drom.

PD: Go read the Feast Day. Reading the Feast Day always makes you happy. Or…well, as happy as you get.

RM: (sigh)

It is the Feast Day of Saint Mellonius, patron of those tiresome individuals who show up in arguments claiming to be the Devil’s Advocate. St. Mellonius was afflicted with one such individual, and worked a great and terrible miracle, transporting this gentleman to the underworld, where he found himself present at a great trial, and taxed with acting as the court-appointed attorney for Satan. Despite his oft-stated desire to advocate for the Devil, this nameless soul soiled himself, wept, and fainted, whereupon he was devoured by the bailiffs. Satan requested a new lawyer and Mellonious returned to Earth.

St. Mellonious is thus invoked both as protection against the appearance of Devil’s advocates, and as a warning to those who consider themselves such. He is represented as a smiling man carrying a large book and holding a finger to his lips.

In the garden, now is the perfect time to plant perennials. Our winters here are sufficiently mild that many perennials will have received several months of gentle growth before being subjected to the killing heat of August. If you are listening to the Hidden Almanac in a different climate, check with your local county extension office.

The Hidden Almanac is brought to you by Red Wombat Love Company, purveyors of fine and groovy loves. Red Wombat --- “We Dig Love.”

Also brought to you by—Drom, there is no International House of Wogitation. You made that up.

PD: They’re giving a lot of money to the station, so I’d shut up and read, Mord.

RM: …the International House of Wogitation. Got a thingy you need wogitated? Call upon I-HOW for all your needs.

That’s the Hidden…the Funkadelic…Almanac for September 29th, 2014. Be safe, and stay out of trouble.


Out of Character

The Hidden Almanac is a production of Dark Canvas Media. It is performed & produced by Kevin Sonney and written by Ursula Vernon. The voice of Pastor Drom is Ursula Vernon. Today's music is Latché Swing with "Hungaria" which you can find at the Free Music Archive. All other content is copyright 2013-2014, Ursula Vernon.

Notes Edit

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