The Hidden Almanac for
Wednesday January 7th, 2015
Episode 207
Previous episode: 2015-01-05
Next episode: 2015-01-09


Today is the birthday of the actress Eleanora DuChamp. It is also the day “Stuff About Town” first appeared in newspapers. It is the Feast Day of St. Jovem, and in the garden, there are stakes with orange ribbons.

Be Safe, and Stay Out of Trouble.


Welcome to the Hidden Almanac, I’m Reverend Mord.

Today is January 7th, 2015.

It is the birthday in 1917 of the actress Lizzie Spatz, who performed under the stage name “Eleanora DuChamp.” She was an experimental avant-garde filmmaker in the 1940s. “Each film,” she said, “must be a total sensory experience. The audience must evolve as much as the film.” Her most famous film, “Laments of the Sabine Women,” is a 44-minute black and white film banned for obscenity in seven countries. It is still listed as an influence on many of the greatest filmmakers today.

And it was on this day in 1908 that the newspaper cartoon, “Stuff About Town” first appeared in the City Post. “Stuff About Town” features the adventures of the streetwise urchin Johnny Stuff. With his sidekicks, the Godwin twins, Stuff engaged in the sort of adorable golly-gee-whiz hijinks popular with readers at the time. Critics were less than impressed. “Pre-chewed pap,” was perhaps the kindest thing said about it. It ran for sixty five years, during which the original creator retired and was replaced by a pigeon with a piece of charcoal taped to its beak.

It is the Feast Day of Saint Jovem, patron of music radio. St. Jovem was martyred nearly a thousand years ago, long before the invention of music radio. It has been suggested that clerical error may be involved in proclaiming this particular patronage, but this has not stopped thousands of Jovem bobble-heads from adorning the soundboards of radio stations throughout the world. As St. Jovem was skinned alive by particularly unpleasant barbarians, the bobble-heads are somewhat distressing. Attempts have been made to make him look happier, but a skinless happy saint with headphones on is not significantly less distressing.

In the garden, those accursed surveyors have come back, and they have sticks. STICKS. Sticks with bright orange ribbons. Sticks which are an affront to the aesthetics of the Hidden Almanac Test Garden! They have expressed the intent to place the sticks throughout the garden for their surveying and leave the sticks there. I have expressed my intent to curse their families and employer unto the seventh generation. They have gone away again. George the crow expressed his displeasure by pooping on one of their vile orange sticks. George is an excellent crow.

Their truck said “CharmX.” I shall set one of the interns to discovering more about this intrusions.

The Hidden Almanac is brought to you by Red Wombat Tea Company, purveyors of fine and inaccessible teas. Red Wombat --- “We Dig Tea.”

Also brought to you by grog! Tired of all those beers that won’t melt the cheap plating off your beer stein? Try grog! Then try more grog! Then wake up on a boat somewhere you don’t remember agreeing to go to. Grog! It’s an adventure!

That’s the Hidden Almanac for January 7th, 2015. Be safe, and stay out of trouble.


Out of Character

The Hidden Almanac is a production of Dark Canvas Media, written by Ursula Vernon and performed and produced by Kevin Sonney. Our theme music is Moon Valley and our exit music is Red in Black, both by Kosta T. You can hear more from Kosta T at the Free Music Archive. All other content is copyright 2013 through 2015, Ursula Vernon.

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