The Hidden Almanac for
Friday June 26th, 2015
Episode 274
Previous episode: 2015-06-24
Next episode: 2015-06-29


Today, Pastor Drom arrives with both good and bad news, and in the garden, there is now a pit into the abyss.

Be Safe, and Stay Out of Trouble.


Welcome to the Hidden Almanac, I’m Reverend Mord.

Today is June 26th, 2015.

PD: Hi, everybody! I’m Pastor Drom!

RM: (sigh) What are you doing here, Drom?

PD: You’re never happy to see me, Mord. But you should be! I have great news!

RM: You’re being transferred to the Ravencoast college in the Glass Wastes?

PD: Was that a joke, Mord? That almost sounded like a joke!

RM: You are delusional, as always.

PD: Sure. Anyway, you remember that DNA sample I took from your crow? It worked out great!

RM: George is an excellent crow. I would expect him to have excellent DNA.

PD: Better than excellent! He’s unique! A new species to science! There are grad students scouring the world for a girlfriend for George right now!

RM: They’re not going to try to take him away, are they?

PD: No, no. As far as they’re concerned, this is his natural habitat. I, uh, might have glossed over that whole Corvus-Wrax thing. And since he lives here, that means that this is now a protected habitat. They’re sending him out his very own species liaison from the Royal Ornithological Society.

RM: Oh…goody.

PD: Anyway, that’s not the best news!

RM: All right…

PD: Because this is now protected habitat, the CharmX people can’t do anything to disrupt the ecosystem! They’ve been ordered to stop drilling! They’re leaving now. In fact I passed the truck on the way into the studio. They were burning rubber, too.

RM: (sigh) Drom, they already opened an accursed pit into the abyss. They were supposed to close it back up.

PD: Accursed pit, you say?

RM: Indeed.

PD: With the eldritch music and the moaning and so forth?

RM: Yes. And if you had left it for another month, they could have dealt with it.

PD: …Awkward. I suppose we could just get about a thousand pounds of concrete…

RM: The interns have all descended the steps. Except for Steve.

PD: Steve’s got a good head on his shoulders.

RM: So now we have to close the pit, Drom. You and I. Not CharmX.

PD: Are we going to rescue the interns first?

RM: Someone has to water the garden.

PD: You realize that this is almost certain death?

RM: I am aware.

PD: Alrighty then! It’s been an honor to work with you, Mord.

RM: I’m sure it has been.

The Hidden Almanac is brought to you by Red Wombat Tea Company, purveyors of fine and inaccessible teas. Red Wombat --- “We Dig Tea.”

Also brought to you by Scarlet Wombat Publishing, including the latest volume of the Pastor Drom Mysteries—the Case of the Poisonous Quail. Wait, what? Drom!

PD: Miracle working does not pay the bills, Mord!

RM: (sigh)

That’s the Hidden Almanac for June 26th, 2015. Be safe, and stay out of trouble.


Out of Character

The Hidden Almanac is a production of Dark Canvas Media, written by Ursula Vernon and performed and produced by Kevin Sonney. Our theme music is Moon Valley and our exit music is Red in Black, both by Kosta T. You can hear more from Kosta T at the Free Music Archive. All other content is copyright 2013 through 2015, Ursula Vernon.

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