The Hidden Almanac for
Friday July 17th, 2015
Episode 283
Previous episode: 2015-07-15
Next episode: 2015-07-20


Today two faculty members of the Ravencoast School of Divinity traveled closer to the surface. It is the Feast Day of the Dandy Saint, and in the garden, there is no gardener.

Be Safe, and Stay Out of Trouble.


Welcome to the Hidden Almanac, I’m Reverend Mord.

Today is July 17th, 2015.

PD: Oh, here we go.

RM: It was on this day that two professors from the Ravencoast School of Divinity negotiated with the leader of the ghasts to obtain safe passage up the giant staircase. Their leader is known as the Mother of Echoes and lives in a tunnel lined with bones of dead Gugs.

PD: And she was a surprisingly reasonable sort. You shouldn’t judge people based on their home décor.

RM: Indeed. With the aid of riding ghasts, they ascended the great staircase—

PD: I still don’t think you should have traded them an intern, though, Mord.

RM: He is a xenoanthropology student. He will be delighted to study the ghast society up close. And they have promised not to eat him.

PD: I suppose there’s that.

RM: The school will send someone to check on him and negotiate his release when he has finished gathering thesis material. Besides, he is much safer than we are. The ghasts and Gugs have been at war for many centuries.

PD: Amazing to think that this is all going on under the Hidden Almanac Test garden.

RM: It is not. We have gone at least twenty miles. I believe we are actually on the outskirts of Echo Harbor.

PD: Oh, well, that explains everything. Maybe we should just stay down here.

RM: RM: The Blight God is the least of the horrors beneath Echo Harbor. Be grateful that we are approaching from the landward side. And anyway, the interns are beginning to regain their free will.

PD: That’s probably a good thing.

IT: I’m hungry. I would like to go back to my dorm room, sir.

PD: Mostly a good thing.

IT: And this ghast saddle is chafing…

RM: So long as it is not chafing the ghast. Let us continue on.

It is the Feast Day of the Dandy Saint. The Dandy Saint has no proper name and little is known about him. He appeared repeatedly in the city during the reign of the Librarian Prince, leading those in danger to safety. On at least one occasion, he liberated a half-dozen citizens from prison where they were facing arrest on charge of owning a goat. His miracles appear to include walking through walls and miraculous healing. He was declared a saint in the century following the assassination of the Librarian Prince, though various authors have suggested that he was merely a very skilled burglar and the healing was a later addition to the story. His feast day is celebrated by sales at high-end clothing stores and the burning in effigy of the Librarian Prince.

In the garden...well, who knows? There are a great many things that can go wrong in the absence of the gardener. I hope to see it again soon. I am certain many things will require staking.

The Hidden Almanac is brought to you by Red Wombat Tea Company, purveyors of fine and inaccessible teas. Red Wombat --- “We Dig Tea.”

Also brought to you by the Mother of Echoes, who encourages all over-worlders to visit the ancient land of the ghaats. Rich in culture and history, where all things die away into silence, and then die away slightly less metaphorically.

That’s the Hidden Almanac for July 17th, 2015. Be safe, and stay out of trouble.


Out of Character

The Hidden Almanac is a production of Dark Canvas Media, written by Ursula Vernon and performed and produced by Kevin Sonney. Our theme music is Moon Valley and our exit music is Red in Black, both by Kosta T. You can hear more from Kosta T at the Free Music Archive. All other content is copyright 2013 through 2015, Ursula Vernon.

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