The Hidden Almanac for
Wednesday September 2nd, 2015
Episode 303
Previous episode: 2015-08-31
Next episode: 2015-09-04


Today we recount the day raccoons invaded the city. It is the Feast Day of the Fallow Fields, and in the garden, there are legumes.

Be Safe, and Stay Out of Trouble.


Welcome to the Hidden Almanac, I’m Reverend Mord.

Today is September 2nd, 2015.

It was on this day in 1961 that a plague of raccoons descended on the city. Under normal circumstances, this would not have been a problem, but many of the raccoons were carrying copies of “Initiation into Hermetics” and began drawing chalk circles around the trash cans and attempting to raise trash golems to destroy the city. They were not particularly dangerous, of course, as the golems kept stopping to wash their hands and were thus easily picked off, but it taxed an already overloaded animal control department. Investigations were launched into who published ritual magic manuals for raccoons. “We don’t plan to prosecute,” said one officer, “we just want to ask what on earth they were thinking.” Ultimately the trail led to Echo Harbor and was then abandoned. The books and chalk were confiscated and the raccoons released in the woods.

It is the Feast Day of the Fallow Fields. This feast day was accompanied by a rite performed over fields that had just been harvested, but which were slated to lie fallow for a season. The rite itself has many variations, but always encompasses gratitude toward the land, a reassurance that it has not been forgotten, and will be planted once against after it had rested. Courtesy towards the earth is never wasted, even in these degenerate times.

In the garden, we turn our attention to the Red Fine, a type of cowpea once widely grown throughout the lowlands surrounding Troyzantium, but now restricted to a very small range. Red Fine is believed to have been introduced from the Coriander Isles hundreds of years ago, brought by sailors impressed from the Isles, some of whom escaped the ships once they reached the port. Several island dialects still endure in the lowlands there, along with a number of crops, though both are in danger of dying out.

This salt-tolerant legume is one of many endangered vegetable breeds, which are in danger of vanishing from cultivation. In the Hidden Almanac test garden, we grow several rare varieties, though the soil is often too heavy for cowpeas from that region.

The Hidden Almanac is brought to you by Red Wombat Tea Company, purveyors of fine and inaccessible teas. Red Wombat --- “We Dig Tea.”

Also brought to you by the Cannibalfly Priesthood, which is holding a bake sale in order to…(sigh)…raise money to continue buying advertising spots on this program so that they may continue to wage their campaign of horror against me. Their bake sale will be at the corner of High Street, under the Kingfisher Bridge, and they promise brownies and small insects.

So there’s that.

That’s the Hidden Almanac for September 2nd, 2015. Be safe, and stay out of trouble.


Out of Character

The Hidden Almanac is a production of Dark Canvas Media, written by Ursula Vernon and performed and produced by Kevin Sonney. Our theme music is Moon Valley and our exit music is Red in Black, both by Kosta T. You can hear more from Kosta T at the Free Music Archive. All other content is copyright 2013 through 2015, Ursula Vernon.

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