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The Hidden Almanac for
Monday September 14th, 2015
Episode 308
HAalbumart-podcast
Previous episode: 2015-09-11
Next episode: 2015-09-16

SummaryEdit

In a slight departure, today we chronicle the history of the great god Corvus-Wrax, and his cult. In the garden the asters are blooming, and there are peppers.

Be Safe, and Stay Out of Trouble.

TranscriptionEdit

Welcome to the Hidden Almanac, I’m Reverend Mord.

Today is September 14th, 2015.

I shall depart from the usual format today, as our listeners may be interested in some information that I have learned regarding the great god Corvus-Wrax. This is unorthodox, but I feel it still falls without the boundaries of educational programming.

Worshippers of Corvus-Wrax believe that prior to the coming of humanity, the world was ruled by terror birds, which is correct. They believe that a race of bird-men built many ancient ruins and conducted dark rites in the secret places of the earth. Here they are incorrect. It was lizardmen.

After the age of the terror birds ended and humans came to dominate the world, the cult of Corvus-Wrax rose at the southern end of the Mountain Kingdom. Like many other cults, it was invented and immediately began claiming credit for things that occurred thousands of years before. However, given that actual crows worship Corvus-Wrax, it seems likely that he actually exists in another dimension and was merely influencing easily touched minds in this one.

This sort of thing happens.

The cult of Corvus-Wrax has been exterminated—genuinely exterminated, not like the mime cult—but the Shrike God, various represented as the brother, lover or cohort of Corvux-Wrax, is believed to still have an active cult presence today, because a certain sort of person really enjoys impaling things.

Uck. That is unfortunate.

Fortunately, in the garden, the blue wood aster is blooming. This is a small, delicate aster, less invasive than its counterparts, and which will even thrive around the roots of pine trees. It is worth planting nearly anywhere, and causes no trouble at all.

The exceedingly hot peppers are finally beginning to ripen. Most of these require a very long growing season, and it is always worrisome, when starting indoors, whether or not they will ripen before frost. It is possible to bring most of them inside in pots, but then you have to deal with all the attendant mess and the damage to the carpets and someone’s pet crow eating the fruit, as birds cannot taste capsacin. So we look forward to a fine harvest.

The Hidden Almanac is brought to you by Red Wombat Tea Company, purveyors of fine and inaccessible teas. Red Wombat --- “We Dig Tea.”

Also brought to you by the Cannibalfly Priesthood. We are also very alarming. We could impale things if we wanted to. We have left you a grasshopper. It was a very large grasshopper, but our priests did not break a sweat. You should be frightened.

We will need the grasshopper back so that we can have it stuffed for our trophy collection.

Very well. I shall leave it in the mailbox.

That’s the Hidden Almanac for September 14th, 2015. Be safe, and stay out of trouble.

OutroEdit

Out of Character

The Hidden Almanac is a production of Dark Canvas Media, written by Ursula Vernon and performed and produced by Kevin Sonney. Our theme music is Moon Valley and our exit music is Red in Black, both by Kosta T. You can hear more from Kosta T at the Free Music Archive. All other content is copyright 2013 through 2015, Ursula Vernon.

Notes Edit

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