Information Edit

Scarlet Wombat Publishing is Pastor Drom's publishing house. Pastor Drom specializes in erotic self-help, but also has a mystery series, memoirs, and the occasional straight-forward self-help work. Scarlet Wombat Publishing frequently sponsors The Hidden Almanac, and Pastor Drom used the proceeds from her book sales to buy the station for Mord.

Not all of her publications are actual books, though. Pastor Drom has a way of planting messages for Mord in the advertising segment, sometimes out of desperation, other times to mess with him.

Publications/Taglines Edit

  • Keep an eye out for my latest book, “How to Win Friends and Make Passionate Love to Agreeable Strangers” coming soon from Scarlet Wombat Books. (Episode 169)
  • “How To Get In Touch With Your Inner Fertility Gods!” This brilliant new work can help you—yes, you!—unlock the secrets of the erotic divine within yourself! Warning: Should you get in touch with your inner fertility god for more than four hours, seek medical help immediately. Seriously, they're not, they're not fooling around with that. (Episode 193)
  • Also brought to you by Pastor Drom’s latest degenerate self-help book. (Episode 199)
  • Also brought to you by Scarlet Wombat Publishing’s latest horrifyingly sexual self-help book by Pastor Drom, (PD: Woo) “How To Seduce The Universe.” (Episode 217)
  • Also brought to you by Pastor Drom’s latest self-help abomination,(PD: Woo!) which is available with all the others in a boxed set that is an affront of eyes of all who see it. Scarlet Wombat Publishing is proud to offer this fine set to help you feel better about your place in a bleak and uncaring cosmos.(PD: Yay!) (Episode 226)
  • including the latest volume of the Pastor Drom Mysteries—the Case of the Poisonous Quail. (Episode 274)
  • latest self-help novel “How To Survive--And Thrive--In An Accursed Pit” by Pastor Drom. Publication date to be decided. (Episode 276)
  • “Pollination Station: Your Guide To Love From the Vegetable Kingdom.” (Episode 284)
  • “Recovering From Post-Pit Depression: A Memoir” (Episode 295)
  • Facing Death with Grace, Dignity, and a Shotgun: The Pastor Drom story (Episode 306)
  • “How To Go Into Hiding For Fun And Profit.” (Episode 312)
  • “Mystery Religions are Crap, Just Buy This Book Instead” (Episode 326)
  • “How To Cultist Proof Your Basement” (Episode 328)
  • "Postcards from a Bunker: The Lessons of Paranoid Solitude" (Episode 341)
  • Wishing all our listeners a bright, hopeful, and productive new year! (Episode 355)
  • Coming To Emotional Terms With The Fact That You May Be Menopausal, a workbook and stabbing iron. (Episode 361)
  • “Aging Is A Beautiful Natural Process, Just Like Gallstones And Leprosy: How to Grow Old Gracefully Without Being Sappy About It.” (Episode 362)
  • “5-Sexy-5: Erotic Haiku From A Bunker," available with both male and female narrators. (Episode 383)
  • You and the Worm: How to Deprogram Nearly Anybody” by Pastor Drom, revised and updated edition. (Episode 396)
  • Pastor Drom’s Copebook. Get through adversity through coloring, guided meditation, and therapeutic screaming (Episode 405)
  • “Ten Steps To A More Evil You” (Episode 409)
  • “Plants in the Toilet: A Manifesto of Art, Desire, and Genetic Modification,” with a foreword by Reverend Mord. (Episode 421)
  • Who would like to say that we love you all. (Episode 425)
  • Voter’s Guide, a completely neutral publication exploring the issues affecting both sides. (Episode 431)
  • “The Life and Death of Pooky the Skeleton” (Episode 439)
  • Dead Bovine Promotional Techniques, Volume 1. Learn the secrets that they don’t want you to know! (Episode 463)
  • “How to Make and Lose and Regain a Fortune, Hopefully.” (Episode 481)
  • Look We Pre-Record This Show, Okay? (Episode 489)
  • “How To Remove Unwanted Houseplants From Your Bunker” by Pastor Drom. (Episode 497)
  • Latest from Pastor Drom! Magical Sigils for Fun and Profit! Reserve your copy today! (Episode 514
  • “A Frustrating Field Guide To Small Green Things That All Look Alike” by Pastor Drom (Episode 534)
  • “Bunker Two: Return to Drom’s Bunker” (Episode 548)
  • “Some People Don’t Know How To Have Fun” (Episode 561)

Messages Edit

  • Have you found out how I’m going to die yet, Mord? I’m very concerned. This is important, Mord. I want to be one of the saints who ascends to heaven without actually dying horribly. Please find a way to make this happen. (Episode 309)
  • "Seriously, What do I Have to do to Get a Pizza Around Here: The Assorted Sufferings of Pastor Drom." (Episode 345)
  • “What to Do When People Won’t Let You Cover For Them At Work" (Episode 367)
  • "If You Call Me A Certain Age Again, Mord, I Will End You," a short chapbook (Episode 381)
  • “Pit Traps I Have Known" Read for the thrilling tale of her descent! Her near miss! Her utterly useless traveling companion. (Episode 387)
  • “It’s Me, You Idiot, Quit Recording And Come Open This Door” including the potentially award-winning essay, “I Heard What You Said About My Singing.” (Episode 391)
  • "How Do I Get This Horrible Birdseed Taste Out Of My Mouth, The Pastor Drom Story" (Episode 413)
  • "Help, Help, Something In My Brain, Help, For the Love of God, Help." (Episode 445)
  • "Incidentally, I Keep A Shotgun Under The Bed, Mord, So You Might Want To Grab It Before The Things In My Brain Notice What’s Going On.” (Episode 447)
  • No, Really, Key Lime Is The Best Pie. (Episode 449)
  • Latest safety manual I Keep It Under The Sink And No They Aren’t Starfish But I Think They’re From Somewhere Else.(Episode 450)
  • “You May Be On To Something, and Other Ballads of Love, Loss, and Euphemism” (Episode 451)
  • They’ve Figured Out You’re Here, Mord, You’d Better Start Running. (Episode 456)
  • Easier Said Than Done: A Workbook on Realistic Expectations. (Episode 459)
  • Bring Me Pie Or I Cannot Be Responsible For My Actions. (Episode 468)
  • “Remember Me Fondly When Mord Kills Me” by Pastor Drom. (Episode 515)

Mentions Edit

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